Days One-hundred and Twenty-Three to One-hundred and Forty-Three. The Incredible two weeks of his R&R.
Okay, so this is going to be an insanely long post.
Sunday 7th December 2013 was probably one of the best days of my whole entire life. I knew that my soldier was on his way home, and although I knew he would be back late afternoon, I was still up at the crack of sparrows. I stayed at home whilst his mom went to go and fetch him from brise. I waited, and waited, and waited. It was the longest day of my life. It will always be such a clear memory, I was sat on the sofa watching the Tamworth football game on TV and all of a sudden my phone went off with a message from Kieran, along the lines of “Sorry I didn’t text you when I landed baby, I had to wait to get wifi because I haven’t paid my phone bill, but I’m home now so come round”. That was it. I jumped up and ran to my car literally just shouting “I’m going” as I ran out.
I don’t think I have ever drove to his house as fast as I did that day, and I cried the whole way. As I pulled up outside his house, he came outside of his door to meet me. There he was, my GORGEOUS soldier who I had missed so much, stood there in his uniform. I didn’t even take my car keys out of the ignition. I ran to him and jumped into his arms. I have NEVER cried so hard with happiness. And my god, that feeling of being able to feel his arms around me, is indescribable. Just for that split second, it made all of the hell of the past 4 months so worth it.
It was so surreal to see him walking around his house, I kept crying. It was simply amazing.
That night we chilled out with his family, got a take away and had an early night. That night was probably THE most perfect night of my life so far.
And the next morning, I woke up with the biggest smile on my face, to wake up next to him after all of the mornings of waking up on my own, was simply amazing.
That day we went shopping. And Kieran had his first McDonalds since before he left for Afghanistan. His face was actually hilarious!
After seeing his face light up from fast food, we went and sorted out his families christmas presents. Oh and Kieran bought himself an iPad.
The next day it was my final day of university, which I had to nip in and do a quick presentation. So we got up early and headed up to Stoke. Kieran hadn’t seen my house so he was excited to see that. And as I ran into uni for 15 minutes, I left him watching Jeremy Kyle in my room. It was literally only 15 minutes which I was out of the house, and that was even with me picking up breakfast for us on the way back. So we decided to go and do a bit more shopping in Hanley seems as we had made the journey up to stoke. We had a great buy whilst we was there…
Matching onesies, Buzz and Woody. This is gay as hell but we found it hilarious. And they are actually really comfy.
That night we stopped at my house, so Kieran could have a chance to see my parents too. We stopped in and watched the football and had some drinks. It was a lovely night.
The next morning we got up and went to my nan and grandads house. We went quite early because Kieran went to Birmingham shopping with some of his mates that afternoon. When he got home, I went to his and dropped off all of the presents for both his birthday and christmas as the days were coming up and I didn’t know if i would be going home before either of them. Kieran then went to play football with the lads and Chloe picked me up from Kierans house. After the lads had finished football, Kieran told me and Chloe to meet them at the pub for a couple of drinks before me and him went back to his house.
Thursday was Kierans birthday. 22 the old fart. We got up and Kieran opened his presents and then we literally chilled for most of the day. We lay on the sofa and watched some films. However, on the night we went out for a meal. Me and Kieran, Chloe and Ryan, George and Heather and Sophie and Ste. It was really nice. We all had a proper laugh and (i think) Kieran got a little squiffy, although he will never admit it.
Friday morning we went into town. I had my nails done and whilst I was having them done Kieran went into town and had his hair cut and picked up a few bits and bobs. It was that night which Kieran and all of his lads mates went out to Bambu in Birmingham to celebrate his birthday. They all dressed up smart and Kieran looked so lovely in the Ralph Lauren shirt which I bought him for his birthday. However, 3:30am, guess who was doing the maccies run for all of them. Heather was around mine and we went and got them all loads of McDonalds when they got home. It was hilarious, they were all SMASHED! It was brilliant. So lovely to see that Kieran had such a good birthday.
However, I was exhausted the next morning because I was up at 7:30am to be at Traceys shop for 9 to get my hair and tan done. It was a nice relax though. I got back to Kierans house about 1pm and he was still in bed. Hanging. They all were, it was brilliant. Everyone left with in 20 minutes of me being back and Kieran decided to get out of bed, but he just passed out on the sofa, he was so poorly bless him. We snuggled up whilst he tried to pull himself together. Luckily, he felt fine by 4pm. For his birthday I payed for us to go and see the second hobbit in 3D at the think tank in Birmingham, but because I knew he was going out on Friday night I booked it for Saturday night instead of morning. We were meant to be going to the Aston Villa v Man United game, which I had arranged a message on the board at half time, but they changed it to the Sunday, so we couldn’t go, but the message still went up which was nice. But we still really enjoyed going to watch the film. By the time we got back it was about 10pm so we decided to get take away because we was meant to go out for a meal but the majority of places would have been shut by then.
Sunday was christmas day. It was such a lovely day. We all got up in the morning and exchanged all of our presents. It was lovely to see everyone so happy. After that Tracey cooked us all breakfast and we all had a chilled day. Then on the night the whole of his family went out for a christmas meal.
I know I keep saying it, but it was amazing. It was lovely to see the members of his family which I hadn’t seen in a while and it was so lovely that they all include me as the family now. I love them all. They all had a three course christmas meal, and there was me with my steak and chips, fussy buggar I am. We didn’t leave the pub until midnight.
Monday was a major lazy day. Me and Kieran lay on the sofa all day watching films. Although we wasn’t doing much, these days meant SO much to me, they were perfect, just chilling out.
Tuesday was our night away. For christmas my mom and dad payed for us to stay in the Novotel Hotel in Birmingham. So we got up and went to the train station. When we got into the hotel we literally checked in, checked out the room, which was gorgeous, and then went for lunch. After lunch we walked to the bullring to do some shopping, however, later on we found out that maps on my phone took us the long way instead of the way which would have took us about 5 minutes. Birmingham was heaving, with it only being the week before christmas, people were shopping for that, but it was packed. We only shopped for just over an hour, and we decided to go back to the hotel room and chill out. PERFECTION. Although we had spent a lot of time together before this day, there tended to be more than just the two of us, so it was nice to have some alone time.
About 6:30/7pm we decided to go out for dinner. We stopped at a restaurant called Coast-to-Coast which was a new place which had opened on broad street. OH MY GOD. It was amazing. I had steak and chips and Kieran had a pork burger. The food was incredible. And the place had such a nice vibe to it. And of course, in good old Kieran fashion, we had cocktails. Yummmm.
After we finished we decided to go around the german Market.
It was both of our first proper time going so it was lovely to walk and have a proper look at everything. However, we both agreed that we wasn’t going to pay the prices for their alcohol, it was so expensive. So we bought one drink each, to get the cups, and then Kieran went into tesco and bought a bottle of vodka and some coke, and we poured that into our cups and drank that. Walking back to our hotel, we decided to go ice skating. It was hilarious. Kieran could not ice-skate to save his life bless him.
After that we went back to the hotel room and drank in the room for a couple of hours whilst Kieran danced around the room like he always does. That day and night I laughed the most that I have laughed since before Kieran left for afghan. I love how well we get on with each other as friends as well as a couple. So happy.
On Wednesday, after checking out we decided to go for lunch on the way back to the train station, so we stopped off at the pub. We didn’t get back to my house until about 3pm. That night we went around to Kierans nan and grandad Glenns house because they were cooking him a dinner. We spent the majority of the time laughing at me and my eating habits as I don’t eat anything at all.
After that I dropped Kieran at the football as he was playing with the lads again. However, after we was stopping at my house, so he got dropped back at my house, had a shower, and then we played cards and had some drinks with my mom and dad.
On Thursday I didn’t really do much until late Thursday afternoon. I went to Kierans house to chill out with him for a bit before we went out and we went to his nan and grandad darkes’ house because they cooked Kieran a dinner as well. We decided to go the pub that night, and then after the pub we ended up in town. There was about 10 of us that ended up going. We went into one bar, and we were the only ones in there, and the music was really low. So we had one drink and then decided to go to Kierans favourite bar in the whole world, a bar called Olivers. Again, we were one of the only ones in there, but we were pretty drunk by this point so we decided to go mental. Kieran was having a dance off with a gay lad, the lot. It was brilliant.
Friday morning, we both woke up hanging. Blergh. Me and Kieran are both terrible for hangovers, so we decided to do sweet FA all day again. This was the day we found out that he had to go back on the Saturday. Booooo! George came around that afternoon and the three of us lay around and watched films and had a big dominos for a hangover cure. We then decided that that night, the three of us and Kierans brother and sister would play a few games and have a few drinks. Kieran and I popped back to my house around 7pm so he could say bye to my parents. This is always the point where it hits me, when I see Kieran saying bye to people. I hate it.
We got back to Kierans about 8:30 and the 5 of us played monopoly for hours, it didn’t seem like it, but it was about 4 hours. We had a right laugh, but I swear that Kieran and George were cheating.
I got a little upset that night because, again, it was my last night of falling to sleep next to Kieran for a long time. It sounds so silly, but falling to sleep with him and waking up next to him is such a lovely feeling.
Saturday was a bitter sweet day. We got up and went to ventura so that Kieran could get his last bits to take back with him, and we decided to go for lunch. The day just seemed to be zipping by. We then went back to his house and started packing up his stuff. I had a lump in my throat the whole day.
When Kierans mom got back from work I left and gave them some alone time to say their goodbyes because she was going out on a works do that night, so it was a little crap that him going back fell on that night because they couldn’t take him to the airport. When I left then it was really starting to hit me, and that was when the all well known heavy heart started to make a re-appearance.
By the time I got back to his house, his nan and grandad darkes had come around to say their goodbyes. I hate it, I hate seeing everyone say goodbye to him. It is honestly the worst feeling in the whole world. That was when the tears started. Literally on and off all night. I can’t explain how it feels, it actually really hurts knowing I was going to have to say goodbye to him again and that this was the last time I was going to be able to cuddle him for 5 months. Argh. That night FLEW by. Before I knew it, it was 1am and his nan and grandad glenn were at his to pick him up.
Hysterical doesn’t explain my state. It definitely doesn’t get any easier saying goodbye for the second time. Kieran hates it when I cry, and he just kept trying to make me laugh. But my god, the pain was awful. That known heartbreak had crept back up upon me. Seeing him walk away from me in his uniform was the hardest thing I have ever done. I just wanted to run after him and beg him not to go, but no matter what I waned, or how much I wanted it, I had to let him go. Watching the car pull off literally killed me, watching his face looking at me out of the back of the car get further and further away was the worst feeling in the whole world. Driving back to my nans house, I couldn’t keep it together. I had to stop my car, I was crying that hard I thought I was going to be sick. And when I got into my nans house, I literally broke down. I felt so weak and I just lay on my bed and cried myself to sleep. My sleep that night was so broken too. I was constantly drifting off and waking up, half expecting Kieran to be there.
The next day was really hard again. I kept crying and I literally didn’t want to do anything. It was as if Kieran being home had been all a dream and I had finally woke up to reality. The two weeks I spent with him were the most PERFECT two weeks ever, they just went SO fast. I feel lost again.
I haven’t really done much this week. The only thing which I really have done was Christmas day. It was a really nice day with my family, and I was so lucky with all of the lovely things which I had. It was also really nice to see how happy my nan was. This time last year she was really ill with cancer and wasn’t able to enjoy christmas very much, but this year she was singing, dancing, laughing, it was lovely to see. The only thing which would have made it perfect was if Kieran would have been here. I thoroughly enjoyed the day, but I did feel like there was something missing.
Last night my parents had some friends and family around for some drinks. Tracey and Paul came around and they brought around this…
A canvas of Kierans images from afghan. It is BEAUTIFUL and made me smile so much. I am so proud of him.
It has been a week today since Kieran left. It feels like so much longer. This time last week I was snuggling up to him, knowing we was in our last hours together. It feels like a life time ago already. I am back to the point of aching for him and desperate to see him. It is so difficult. But I have so many incredible memories to help me through the next 5 months and I have never felt so in love with this man and so strong as a couple. I just hope these months hurry.